Thursday, October 8, 2009

Spring, illusion, insomnia

As well as the distortion of time that happens at low light, there is another quality to the landscape at night: One can not say for sure if the images captured then are from a dream, from a waking reality, or whether there is an area in between …

I was thinking about this on Tuesday. That morning, I caught a tram, arrived at university, sat down in the studio and worked at my bench as usual, until late in the afternoon. Then I woke up at home. I had dreamt the whole day in real time.

My mind must have been willing, but body too exhausted. Seasons are changing again, insomnia is here, circadian rhythms reshuffled or disturbed, however you look at it. This unpredictable time before the still, heavy, stable warmth of summer.

In Finland, a long time ago, the melting of snow from the branches of trees marked the arrival of early spring. On clear nights I lay awake and watched the newly freed forest sway in the wind, casting slowly moving shadows on my bedroom wall. It was hard to stay indoors then, everything outside was calling.

Here, with the first spring moons the restlessness returns.

Yesterday, I went out and walked around, late (in our family this is normal), unable to sleep, unable to do anything else useful. Night is such a gentle friend, it lets you see, but at the same time, feel invisible and at one with vast spaces, with the movement of air. No ceilings of blue skies or clouds, just endless, expanding deep above. Room to breathe, not having to talk to anyone or be seen by anyone. Quiet, only few people awake. Close to freedom, but still close to home.


Home, seen from the street, early Thursday 08/10/09

– Click on the images to get a better sense of space –

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